Paired test before marriage

A British family law firm is urging couples to take a “compatibility quiz” before getting married or deciding to live together.

Bross Bennett’s compatibility test focuses on key questions about finances, family ties, children and aspirations that most couples struggle with and might have to answer anyway if their marriage breaks down and they end up divorcing.

Partner Ruth Broses compared taking the quiz to the kind of considerations and research an employer might make before hiring someone.

“No one who is truly committed to a relationship will ever mind making the full and frank disclosure that is asked of them; if they do, you might like to ask yourself why,” she said in an emailed statement containing the quiz.

The quiz asks about assets and how each party would like to share them, what kind of relationships they have with their extended family and friends, whether they want children, their religious views, spending habits and career plans:

A copy of the quiz is below:

Finance

Do you know the extent of each other’s assets? How do you both view the sharing of these assets? Do you have the same attitude to saving?

Will one of you want to put into a pension what the other wants to put into a new car?

Will you pool your resources or do you want to keep everything separate? Joint accounts or separate? Will you contribute in proportion to your incomes, or equally?

Are you going to have to pay off your partner’s debts perhaps from what you thought was going to be the deposit on your house?

Family Ties

What sort of relationship do you have with your extended family? Are they good at staying in touch? Are they local? Affectionate? Over-involved? Have you had any major fallings out?

Children

Do you want children? How many? How do you want to raise your children? What sort of values do you want to pass on?

Religion

What are your religious views — do you agree on what religion you will bring up the children in? Church/mosque/synagogue? Once a week or once a year? Or no religion at all.

Leisure and fun

Do you like doing the same things in your spare time? Do you share common interests? Is your idea of a holiday lying flat on the beach for two weeks and your partner’s rock-climbing?

Lifestyle

What sort of lifestyle are you aiming for? Where do you want to live?

Spending

Do you have an expensive shoe or gadget habit? Does one of you think of a particular purchase as an essential that the other regards as a “discretionary spend”? Do you have any other secret addictions: handbags, chocolate, football? Do you gamble, online or otherwise?

Work

Are your respective career paths compatible; is either of you going to have to make compromises? Are you prepared to? Will you want to give up work when you have children? What does your partner think about this and can you manage financially? What about part-time working?

Roles – traditional or modern?

Will you expect to live along traditional lines: woman as homemaker and man as breadwinner? Who will organize the finances? Will household responsibilities be shared equally? Who will assume responsibility for paying bills?

Honesty

Are there any old flames for which you still hold a candle?

Different lifestyles

I know two female friends: one is my close friend, 38-year-old, had married a short, no children; one of my classmates, but also 38 years old, the daughter admitted to a focus on this year’s high school, marital relations is not well, make do with living. The former said: no children can have more time to work, when they have more leisure time to play. Such a nice life, liberty and happiness, more suited to their fun personality. The latter said: I have endured, because high school is the daughter of a key three-year period, not because of family turmoil of the daughter. Bear down for so many years, not bad this year. Later, perhaps then choose your favorite life. The former, it is generally considered very avant-garde, but also care about the blind spot of DINK families without children, the basis for the maintenance of the family is far too weak. Even if the split, they would have too much regret. Will not be the enemy, there may still be friends. Speaking to others, a tone is more than a “husband” “wife, “look very calm and relaxed. The latter is the common features of ordinary Chinese families, feeling no (or weak a), but boy, was still closely linked to each other have a kind of sacrifice. Tolerate it, Ren passed, mortal life by. Seems to have a deep regret, in fact, will think about such a matter, a vigorous love life only in a dream interpretation of several back. Flash, people get into the Laojing, no asking for too much out. This is just two different lifestyles. I will not praise this show or derogatory manner. Recognition of diverse ideological circle in people’s lives there, this is the only correct approach. Each life cannot be perfect. There is no perfect life, is real. If we truly lived life is worth it. This morning, just friends with a known for many years talked about Zhou Guoping, said of his book, “niu” a book. Friends of the Public Philosophy appreciate Zhou Guoping. Like his delicate emotional expression and a profound understand of life. His language is plain real exposed, most people can understand. I said I like the philosophers are single, such as Nietzsche, Schopenhauer. A professional philosopher is not caught in their love, to meet in romantic happiness. He thought because of earthly delights to tie him down too much, but much less depth of warmth. Of course, my view is debatable, but I am not prepared to debate with her friends. Zhou Guoping words I said I could write, if I had a similar life experience and life experience to say. Nietzsche’s text, but I cannot write, cannot be copied. Friends say that I brag, and I recognized because I have no way to prove he can. The fact is that the final say. I say not, others say not too. Philosophers thought about human life, the lives of ordinary people through single point, in fact, are understandable, as long as they own pleasure. Fortunately, not married, divorce may not be shameful. Lived up to the temperament and character and afterlife of a being, human life, not ill-treated you.